Good Men Don't Molest Kids

After waiting for the dust to settle on the latest child sex abuse scandal involving a prominent member of the evangelical community, I am ready to say what needs to be said.   It really makes no difference which perpetrator I am talking about, he is just one of a string of high-profile “men of God” who have been exposed as child molesters in recent days.  The fact that these perpetrators are being exposed doesn’t trouble me; I am thrilled every time one of them is caught because I know that future victims are being spared the horror of abuse.  But unfortunately, we are just seeing the tip of the iceberg.  For every one that gets caught there are many more who don’t.  

What has me fired up is not that these predators are being exposed; it is the idiotic way we evangelicals react when they are exposed.  And our response is so pathetically predictable; we react the same way every single time!  First we are horrified that one of own could be involved in such a heinous act.  But why are we shocked?  Don’t we all know that sexual abuse is prevalent in our society?  Don't we understand that pedophiles come to our churches and that stained glass windows and ushers don't keep them away?  Don't we understand that in many cases it is not the predators from the outside coming in but the predators that we love and trust from within who are the greatest threat to our children?  

After the shock wears off we immediately go into instant restoration mode and try to redeem the abusive pastor.  Never mind if he repents or not, let's just get him back in the pulpit doing what "God called him to do".  Now days, we don't even require the pastor to step down.  Just let him stay on the job and we'll take up more offerings and shower him with love and approval and hope this whole things blows over quickly.  What about the victim?  Oh we don't even think about them - secretly we think they were sent by Satan to destroy the ministry. You know what I am talking about, don't you?

I have a newsflash for the Body of Christ, are you ready?  Here it is: Good men don’t molest kids (and neither do good women).  You would think this would be a no-brainer but judging from the recent responses to several high-profile cases of child-abusing evangelical leaders, it seems that many of us are very confused.  Let me say it again, “Good men don’t molest kids”.  And while I am at it, can I give you another newsflash?  "God doesn't anoint child molesters either".  Oh I can hear the gasps  under your breath right now because  I know I have touched a raw nerve.  This hogwash that we throw around about how the pastor is such an anointed man of God and just happened to have a bad day and molested a child has got to stop.  This nonsense that we aren't allowed to speak up and condemn the sin of abuse under the pretense of "judge not" scriptures is not even biblical.  There are more scriptures encouraging us to "test the spirits", "check the fruit", "discern" and yes even "judge" than there are telling us not to judge.  According to I Corinthians 5 we are supposed to judge those in the body of Christ but leave judging sinners up to God.  It is high time we did some righteous judging in our churches and deal with the sin that is polluting us from within. 

Can we do some righteous judging right now?  Can we just get real for just a moment?  Do we even know what a child molester is?  A child molester is a deviant person.  They have twisted, perverted  thoughts about children.  When you and I see an innocent and vulnerable child, we are instinctively compelled to protect them but child molesters see the same child as an object to exploit for their own sexual gratification.  In plain English that means that child molesters lust after children and they  fantasize about having sex with them!  It is true that power and control are the driving forces for abusers to abuse but sex is the means they gain that power and control.  If it were just all about power and control, the abuser would not need to involve sex in his abuse.  Those who physically abuse children don't use sex - they use their fists.  But child molesters force children into sexual acts.  We in the Body of Christ have this mistaken notion that there is a difference between the dirty old man who abuses kids and our beloved pastor or church leader who abuses kids.  There is no difference – no matter how you package these people, they all do the same thing.  They have sex with children!  Scientists and researchers tell us that after a person acts on their fantasies and abuses a child, something gets hardwired in their brain that compels them to abuse over and over again.  They say that once you are a child molester, you are always a child molester.  Child molesters will abuse until they are stopped.

I can hear you shouting me down: what about the grace and forgiveness of God?  What about it?  At the sake of being seen as a heretic let me preface what I am about to say.  We evangelicals have the mistaken notion that “sin is sin”.  I want to blow that myth to smithereens.  Not all sin is the same.  The Bible says that we have all sinned but it doesn’t say that all our sin is the same.  Some sins carry consequences that affect people for the rest of their lives.  It is one thing to lie and gossip about a person and another thing entirely when you abuse or murder that same person.  All is sin but obviously not with the same consequences.  God forgives the child molester when he repents; however most of the time God does not remove the consequences for that sin.  Two child molesters in prison can both be suffering the same consequences for their sin.  One can be living in the forgiveness and grace of God while the other is still living in rebellion towards God.  Does this mean that the former prisoner is not forgiven by God?  No, be is forgiven but there still is a price to pay. 

Where we go wrong is when we try to do the restoration and redemption work for God.  The Bible didn't call us to redeem anyone.  We don't have that ability.  Nor do we have the ability to restore.  That is a work of the Holy Spirit.  We are called to be reconcilers but that is to reconcile someone back to God - not back to ministry.  So instead of acting like public relations representatives we need to give that person up to God and leave them there.  We don't need to yank them back into ministry.  We don't need to hide their sin.  We don't need to repair their damaged reputation.  We need to leave them with God and let God work on their heart.  If they are unrepentant then we need to cut off contact with them.  Don't look at me like that - I Corinthians 5 says if they refuse to repent we aren't even supposed to eat with them. That's excommunication isn't it?  When was the last time you saw that happen in the church?  But what if this pastor is someone you loved and have known for years?  I don't see where the Bible puts any riders on that verse - you are not to fellowship with them.  This may seem harsh but we do our child molesting pastors and ministry leaders a real disservice when we don't allow them to hit rock bottom and cry out in desperation to God for themselves.  Many of us have had that experience where we have hit rock bottom and had no one to turn to but God.  Many glorious testimonies come from those who have hit rock bottom.  But we don't allow God the time to do that in our child molesting pastor's life.  We are too busy repairing his image, taking up love gifts and pampering his ego.  No, the pastor who molests a child needs to hit rock bottom.  If there is any chance of him being restored, he needs to fall on his face before God and repent.

So what are we supposed to do when the next scandal breaks out?  We are to surround the victim with love and support.  This is an area where the church just flat out fails.  Many a victim has gotten threats, vicious retaliation and hostility from the Body of Christ when they have come forward.  This is not right.  I don't care how much you love your pastor, you need to embrace that brokenhearted victim who has come forward.  They are not an enemy of God.  They were not sent by Satan to destroy the ministry.  They are a victim.  Don't tell me you love God and then turn around and vilify a victim who speaks up.  Don't tell me you love Jesus and then refuse to be his hands and feet to those who through no fault of their own were preyed upon.  You need to love that victim with the love of Jesus.  You have no idea how many victims come forward expecting the Body of Christ to be loving and supported only to be treated like garbage.  These precious souls are leaving our churches in droves and it is precisely for this reason.  We have failed to love them.  We enable the child molester and hate the victim.  And that is why church has become irrelevant for many abuse survivors.  You ask a group of survivors where they would recommend a victim get help and you will see - church is the last place we go for help.  We go to secular therapists who have the skills to help us with our trauma but they can't answer the one question that just gnaws on the inside of us: where was God in all of this mess?  That question we are left to grapple with on our own while the church which is supposed to be a spiritual hospital is more like a country club that caters to those who are healthy, wealthy and blessed.  If you don't believe me, try going to a church when you are broken, fragile and lost and see how much love you get.

In summary, the next time a scandal hits and there will be many more as God cleans up the church, can we just remember one thing?  This is not a good man;  she is not a good woman.  Regardless of how they look or the platitudes they can recite, at their inner core is a person who lusts after children and then acts on those vile urges.  This person would molest your child or grandchild in a heartbeat if given the chance.  When these child molesters go to prison or lose their ministries, we don't need to hate them but we sure don't need to enable them.  Pray for them but leave them to God - he is fully capable and doesn't need our help.  Embrace the victim and show them the love and compassion of Jesus.  Let them know it wasn't their fault.  And give the child molester the time with God that they desperately need without interfering and trying to "fix them".  

And can we just remember just one thing and refrain from our charade of shock, bewilderment and public relations?  Good men don't molest kids. Good mean don't molester kids....

Prairie Bible Institute Hosts Conference While Ignoring its Survivors

Just when you think Prairie Bible Institute couldn't get any more clueless, they really outdid themselves this time.  I don't make this stuff up folks - I don't have to!  As long as Mark Maxwell remains President of the school, there will always be fodder for this blogger to write about.

Believe it or not, Prairie Bible Institute announced that they would be hosting a Global Connections conference March 14-15, and the focus would be on human trafficking and violence against women.  This in light of the fact that it is well documented that PBI has yet to even acknowledge its own 90+ abuse survivors.   For the past nearly two years, the survivors have been lobbying the school to bring in G.R.A.C.E. (Godly Response to Abuse in  Christian Environments) to conduct an investigation and publicly record the changes that Prairie needs to make in order to protect children and not allow the atrocities of the past to happen again.

It has been well documented that President Mark Maxwell continues to harbor a child molester on his staff.  He is well aware of the details of this abuse as given to him by the victim - the daughter of the child molester on his staff.  This child molester is Mark Maxwell's Executive Assistant and has full access to all the students of both in the high school and Bible school.  In addition to this, Mark Maxwell continues to completely ignore the many emails sent to him by survivors.  He refuses to even acknowledge receipt of these messages.   The daughter of his Executive Assistant sent a 27 page email detailing her abuse.  The last email was sent in April 2012 and Mark has never responded.  Even after this was brought to his attention, he continues to ignore her heartbreaking story of abuse.

It is interesting for those of us who were at PBI during its heyday, all we heard was missions, missions, missions. Every spring and fall they had a missions conference where we would sit for hours listening to missionaries talk about the need for more help and then the organist would begin to play and the long-drawn-out altar calls would begin. There was enormous pressure put on us students to come to the front and dedicate ourselves to be missionaries. If you didn’t leave the pew (like me) you were made to feel like such a good for nothing Christian who hadn’t died to themselves. LE Maxwell would holler about crucifying ourselves, dying to the flesh, and giving up the pleasures of the world. I never felt called to go to Africa and so I never went down front. And I remember feeling like such a heel because of it. There was so much guilt put on you that you were wasting your training, you were not being a “disciplined solider for Christ”. Those of us who did not go to the mission field were expected to live frugal lives and financially support those who went. There was a sign on the wall front and center in the Tabernacle that read:

Is there a soul who died, who died because of me
Forever shut away from heaven and away from Thee
Because I tightly clutched my little earthly store
Nor sent they messengers to some distant shore?

I had a staff kid tell me that they had a mission barrel in their home and none of the kids in their home could keep any gifts given to them. If they received a gift from relatives, it went straight to the mission barrel. They were told “the children in Africa need it more than you”. So all their lives, they never got to keep a Christmas or birthday gift. And this is what PBI expected of us – sacrifice your life, your dreams, your plans, everything for missions. If you didn’t then you were still “full of the flesh” and useless to God.

Fast forward to 2012 and that same old PBI stinking thinking is still alive and well. We survivors are being told the message that “forget your pain and what you have been through; it is time to focus on the needs of abuse victims overseas and around the world. This is the same old manipulation used on us at the missions conferences. Can’t you hear the administration saying “quit feeling sorry for yourselves, you don’t have it half as bad as those who are caught up in human trafficking. Those are real victims, you just have an axe to grind with PBI and need to get over it already”. So if we were going to be good little Prairie-ites we would shut up and take up the cause of these victims who need our help. And the sad thing is that there is never going to be a time when there aren’t victims somewhere. We have stuffed the pain for decades, don’t you think we deserve our time to be heard?

I can just about predict what is going to happen at this conference. There will be some sad, sappy stories, people will cry for the little children, drop a few bucks in the offering and take a newsletter and prayer card. Then they can all feel good about themselves for doing their part to “save” these victims. They will go home to bash some more PBI survivors in their self-righteous way and say “thank God I helped the real victims today, not these good for nothing low-lifes.” And life goes on at Prairie Bible Institute and the survivors still stand out in the cold.

I Am An Abuse Survivor - I Am Not a Psycho

Just when you think you couldn’t hear anything more outrageous from a pastor, here comes Dr. Marc Monte, Senior Pastor of Faith Baptist Church in Avon, Indiana taking to Twitter to proclaim that abuse victims are psychos.  At a time when his alma mater, Bob Jones University is being investigated for allegations of child abuse ironically by a group called GRACE (Godly Response to Abuse in the Christian Environment), Monte lashes out at victims in a graceless manner that is anything but godly.  He would do well to sit and learn a few things from GRACE before he opened his mouth.  His remarks made me physically ill but sadly are indicative of what many ministry workers in the evangelical community actually think.  Monte was just stupid enough to say them.  Let's go through his various tweets and I will comment on each one.I am not surprised that Dr. Monte never heard a word about abuse while he was at BJU.  Child molesters are not prone to broadcasting their evil deeds.  He shows his complete ignorance of the issue of child abuse by assuming that just because he didn’t hear about it then it must not have happened.  Child abusers operate under the veil of secrecy and victims are shamed into silence.  It often comes as a complete shock to everyone when the abuse is finally disclosed.

As for his comment that “psychos feel abused”, based on the context of his tweet, I take it to mean that Monte thinks the abused are psychos.   Dr. Monte, must have intellectual dsylexia because it is actually the exact opposite: it is the abusers who are psycho not the victims.  A victim of abuse is just that – a victim.  They don’t feel abused, they were abused.  And they certainly are not psychos.  I can’t think of any scenario where a pastor would use the word "psycho" in reference to abuse victims.  The lack of compassion in this pastor's hurtful words is staggering.  This remark is ghastly in it’s cruelty and abhorrent in it’s mockery.  I am a survivor of ten years of sexual abuse at the hands of my preacher father and I can assure you that I am not a psycho.  As an advocate for abuse victims, I have heard  many hurtful things said by pastors geared at silencing survivors and Dr. Monte’s comment ranks right up there as one of the most despicable.  It sounds like something that a predator would say - not a pastor.  I wonder why a pastor would speak in such an obnoxious manner to abuse victims who have done nothing to him.  I had to ask myself, “Is this pastor an abuser himself?”  This remark certainly sent up the red flags and put me on high alert.  Whether Monte is a child molester or not, I don’t know but I do know that he is abusive to survivors and that gives me pause.

The final sentence of his tweet says, “The rest of us had fun in a protected place”.  This is a subtle stab in the heart to the BJU survivors and it has a two-prong barb to it.  Monte might as well be a Pharisee in the synogue thanking God that he was not like the sinful publican.  He is basically saying “I was blessed and you weren’t.”  It is arrogance that is devoid of all compassion and humanity.  It is self-righteousness on steroids.  And secondly is the subtle message of “why don’t you just get over it already?”  This is a common theme that survivors hear all the time.  People who have no clue of the pain the victims have endured want to dismiss us with trite cliches like “if you aren’t happy it is your own fault” and “all you need is some wind in your sails”.   Again this speaks to the lack of compassion and failure to comfort which was the hallmark of Jesus’ ministry.

Marc Monte goes on to tweet “too many “victims” use the internet as a platform for whining”.  Oh really?  Who made him the authority of what can and cannot be discussed on-line?  I am a survivor that suffered in silence for decades and I am not going to let Pastor Monte or anyone else tell me what I can and cannot discuss on-line.  I have found my voice and I am speaking!  You will notice too that Monte arrogantly puts quotes around the word “victim” to insinuate that we are not true victims – we just made things up to get attention.  And finally he mocks the voice of survivors by calling their words “whining”.  What should we call his tweets “blabbing”?  This is disrespectful to every survivor who has found their voice – we are not whiners any more than we are psychos.  This is just despicable any way you look at it.

And finally Monte says, “If laws were broken, involve the police – not the internet”.  This is just another way of saying “here’s a quarter call someone who cares”.  Again Monte shows his complete ignorance on the issue of child abuse.  Most survivors take years to come forward and by then there is no evidence for law enforcement.  That is assuming that first of all, you can report your abuse to law enforcement.  Many times the statue of limitations has run out and there is no way for the survivor to report the crime.  In my case, it took me 42 years to talk to law enforcement only to discover that in the USA the statue of limitations had run out.  However in Canada where I was also abused I was able to report my father’s abuse.  But it was my word against my father’s word.  And guess who won?  There was no forensic evidence to give to the police.  I had no proof that my father repeatedly raped me other than a broken heart.  Unfortunately there is no machine they can hook you up to that can test for a broken heart.  The police could do little but listen to my story. 

I feel sorry for any survivor who sits under the ministry of Pastor Marc Monte.  It is quite obvious what he thinks of you.  I wouldn’t give this guy one more minute of my time.  He has proven that he is cruel and hateful to those who are brokenhearted.  He is the poorest excuse for a pastor that I have seen in a long time.  Jesus laid out his mission when he spoke in the temple and said “The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he hath anointed me to preach the gospel to the poor; he hath sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to preach deliverance to the captives, and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty them that are bruised, To preach the acceptable year of the Lord.” Do you see any of this same spirit in Marc Monte?  I think not.  When I see pastors who go out of their way to hurt the wounded, my blood boils.  As an advocate for abuse victims, I can’t tell you how many hundreds of stories I have heard from church kids who have completely turned their backs on God because the people who should have represented Jesus to them, but abused them instead.  One thing I do know and that is that when you show love and compassion for the broken, you touch the heart of Jesus.  There is no telling how many broken people have been cut to the heart by the vicious words of Pastor Monte.  No wonder so many people are leaving the church.  The church has become irrelevant.  Survivors know the difference between love and hate and it makes no difference what title you put on your name.  If this is what Monte calls Christianity, they want no part of it.

Today there are an estimated 60 million abuse victims in the USA alone.  Pastor Monte owes each of us an apology. The damage his words have done worldwide, is incalculable.

 

Maxwell, Inc. (doing business as) The Healing Team

Forget everything you ever thought you knew about the Healing Team because most of it is bogus.  Prairie Bible Institute has been downright deceitful in the way they have portrayed this group of alumni who are here to ”help” the survivors.

For starters Prairie has insisted that this is just an ad-hoc group of volunteer alumni with no real ties to PBI.  This is not so!  Ruth Maxwell created the group and she and Mim Phibbs (also a Maxwell) have been calling the shots since day one.  They just don’t want anyone to know that they are the powers-to-be.  Make no mistake about it – dealing with the healing team is the same as dealing directly with PBI - you might as well save time and just call Mark Maxwell directly.  Perhaps this explains the secrecy with the healing team and how it was like pulling teeth to get someone to identify the team members.  The ones they have identified are just puppets of Ruth Maxwell and Mim Phibbs.  Which begs the question, why did the Maxwells feel the need to hide this from everyone?  Perhaps it is because they have an agenda and want to “catch” as many unsuspecting survivors as they can so they can sucker them into following the plan of getting survivors to tell their stories in the quietest way possible without anyone being the wiser.  You will notice that we have never heard a single story from a survivor who used the healing team.  We have never heard the number of survivors who have used their services.  All of that is kept very hush-hush.  Why?  I’ll tell you why. Because PBI would like to have you think that there are no “real” cases of abuse.  Remember the time Mark was quoted in the media as saying “I think we might have a real situation here”.  This exposed his true feelings – he didn’t believe what we survivors were saying was true.  And even if he did believe, he didn’t want it to be known.  After all, any “real” case of abuse is a black mark on his school and God knows how hard he has tried to protect the image of his beloved school.

We shouldn’t be surprised that the healing team has a direct pipeline back to Mark Maxwell.  Remember when Mark assigned the nurse from the board to be our point of contact? He encouraged all survivors to confidentially contact Linda Brinks.  I had a survivor tell me that she did call and talked to Linda briefly and within a half-hour of that call, Mark Maxwell was on the phone inviting himself to visit this survivor in her home!  She was horrified and told him no!  One of the first things he said was “I heard you made a call to Linda Brinks”.  So much for confidentiality and so much for Mark not controlling the process.  Mark Maxwell is a micro-manager and can’t stand the thought that anything can be done without his supervision. The reason he is opposed to hiring GRACE is because he does not want to give up this control.  He wants to be able to manage the process by which survivors speak their truth.  No one, not even me should be allowed to manage that process.  It needs to be handled by a true third party.

Now before you think that I am against any survivor getting help, let me explain what my issues are with having PBI have their own healing team.  There are several things I don’t like about it.  First there is the exclusivity of the group.  The healing team does not welcome all survivors and are specifically interested only in the survivors who are amicable to reconciliation with the school. There have been several survivors who have given up their faith.  They have proclaimed themselves agnostics and atheists.  Just watch the exchanges that some of these individuals have had with the alumni online and you will see that the old self-righteous condemnation mentality is still very much alive and well at PBI.  I am opposed to any solution to help the survivors, which is not inclusive of everyone, regardless of their belief system or lack of it.  All one has to do is look at the survivors that Mark Maxwell refuses to respond to and you will know that they are cherry picking the survivors they deem worthy of a response.  If you aren't worthy then you don't get a response. 

Secondly, I am opposed to the discrepancy between the ways healing team survivors are treated versus those who don’t use the healing team.  Remember the third party we used to have?  Centre Street Church withdrew their support and left not because there were not enough survivors coming forward.  They left because they couldn’t cosign the way PBI was paying for therapy for healing team survivors and NOT paying for therapy for the survivors who contacted them.  It was unethical and Centre Street Church was going to have no part of it.  They graciously gave PBI an undeserved way out by making a politically correct statement for the press.  They should have nailed PBI for being so unethical.  I know for a fact that Centre Street Church paid for therapy for a survivor because PBI refused to pay after the survivor had already been given treatment.  This was not only unethical – it was disgusting.  The reason survivors quit contacting Centre Street was because we were sensing some uneasiness in the air between them and PBI and we were waiting it out to see how things played out.  PBI spun it to say that the numbers being thrown around were highly inflated.  The truth is that most of the survivors have not spoken yet.  They will in time given the right time and place.

Thirdly, I am really opposed to the healing team’s emphasis on forgiveness and reconciliation.  At the heart of this is just another attempt for PBI to get people to move on prematurely without really dealing with their inner pain.  It is almost better to leave survivors in their pain then to trick them into a pseudo state of healing that later crumbles and makes the survivor feel even worse pain than before.  I am not opposed to healing and reconciliation but these are works of the Holy Spirit that men cannot manufacture.  True healing and reconciliation does not require survivors to “forget their past” but allows the survivor to integrate their past with their present.  A truly healed survivor is one who can talk about their pain and use their experience to help others.  God never intended for us to forget our abuse.  He does not perform lobotomies and take away our memories.  What he does do it takes our raw pain and uses the comfort he gives us to comfort others.  I am vehemently opposed to the superficial way that PBI groups have treated survivors.  I would rather be labeled “negative” and be talking about real emotions and real pain then be one of the “girls that wanna have fun” survivors who are not even scratching the surface of their problems.  The only way to deal with this pain is to look it in the eyeball and stare it down until the pain releases its hold on you.  I see none of that evident in PBI’s approach.

Fourthly, I am disgusted that Prairie has held no perps accountable.  Don’t even get me started on Mark Maxwell’s cheap trick of going to the RCMP.  That was all for publicity sake.  He knew that no one would be prosecuted for crimes from decades ago.  Mark says that contacting the RCMP was “raising the bar to the highest standard”.  I beg to differ with him.  It was merely leaving the bar at the bare minimum.   There is a much higher standard that any Bible college should adhere to and that is the Word of God.  I know Prairie is a Bible college in name only but if Mark wants to raise the bar then he should check out his Bible and start following the instructions laid out by the Apostle Paul to expose and ex-communicate those who abuse children.  Instead of excommunicating child molesters, PBI harbors them.  Mark Maxwell has a known child molester on his executive staff right now.

Fifthly, I am opposed to any solution that allows PBI and Mark Maxwell to control the process on how these survivor’s stories will be heard and acknowledged.  Prairie has proven to be incapable of being trusted to do this in-house.  We need a legitimate third-party that will document the areas that Prairie has failed to protect children, the weaknesses that allowed abusers to abuse with impunity, and the factors that caused abuse to flourish.  This needs to be documented and distributed to the public so that all of us can learn from the atrocities that occurred in the past.  This third-party needs to be able to distribute funds for therapy without any interference from PBI. 

Getting back to the healing team.  Remember the survivor who got a pre-paid trip to Three Hills and had a “glorious” experience meeting with Mark Maxwell?  That was all very much orchestrated by Ruth Maxwell and Mim Phibbs.  Funny isn’t it that no other survivor was ever offered this?  I remember Mark doing a radio interview with the survivor and saying that she was from “one of the grand families of Prairie”.  So apparently nothing much has changed at PBI.  In grade school, I remember feeling out of league with those whose names were Kirk, Olson, Maxwell and Rendall.  If you weren’t related to them, you definitely were not in the inner circle.  It was evident on the playground in third grade. 

In keeping control of the healing team, Prairie is able to control what the public finds out.  I truly believe in my heart that PBI knows the scope of the abuse of children that was perpetrated by its staff on campus – but they want to squelch that information in order to protect their reputation.  When a survivor told Ruth that her abuser was a student and not staff, Ruth replied, “Oh good, that’s so much better.”  Better for whom?  Better for PBI that’s who!  Ruth’s response is telling and really indicative of the attitude of the administration.  Remember when Mark Maxwell sent out a memo after the RCMP announced that they were not laying charges on the ten cases that were reported to them?  Mark Maxwell said he was “grateful”.  Grateful!  I can think of so many things that a college president could say at a time like this…”I feel sorry for the survivors who are hurting right now”…”it must be so disappointing to the survivors who had the courage to come forward”…”it is a tragedy that these perpetrators will not be held accountable”.  No, he said none of these things.  Mark Maxwell was “grateful”.  Why?  Well because there would be no public airing of PBI’s dirty laundry that’s why.  No one would know about the faculty who taught in the school during the day and raped little children at night. No one would hear about the deviants that were employed by the school and no one would find out about the times when Prairie’s administrators knew and looked the other way.

Now I understand why I am so despised by the healing team – Ruth and Mim both refuse to have contact with me.  There is no welcome mat for me.  As soon as I started to get vocal about the abuse at Prairie, these two drew a line in the sand.  They don’t even acknowledge me.  I am despised and rejected – a person that is not worthy of their attention or time.  When I have tried to reach out to them, they completely ignore me.  And it is just as well because it allows me to keep my focus on tearing down the walls that have made PBI such a citadel of silence.  My job doesn’t allow me to be chummy with too many people.  I have to step on too many toes.

I keep going back what alumnus Janice Walker said shortly before her death.  She had reached out to me and poured out her heart about her concerns with the healing team.  Janice saw first hand the way that survivors were manipulated.  She tried to make things right and was ignored by Ruth Maxwell (see a pattern here?).  When someone did respond to her – it was done in a spirit of self-righteousness and condemnation.  The message that came through loud and clear was “we are more spiritual than you and we have decided to do it this way – we don’t care what you think!”  Does this remind you of the Prairie Bible Institute that we knew as kids?  For more on this see the following link http://pbisurvivors.com/index.php/blog/the-healing-team-hurting-or-helping/

I shudder to see the survivors who have gone to the healing team and fear for the damage that is being done to them.  I hate to think of the manipulation that is going on behind the scenes and I worry about the day when the fragile “healing” these survivors think they have found disintegrates and they crash and burn.  Who will be there to pick up the pieces?  Who will be there to pick them up?  Will their trust in people be permanently destroyed?    How about their trust in God?  None of that seems to matter to Prairie who is hell-bent on saving the reputation of the school.  When you put the reputation of the school ahead of people, you will always go wrong.  People must come first.

Which brings me to my last point.  There is news on the horizon that Ruth Maxwell is leaving South Africa to move back to Canada.  I don’t know what her plans are but seeing the way she has inserted herself into the inner-workings of PBI, I would venture to say that she is going to be helping brother Mark navigate these troubled waters.  The school is in dire financial straits.  The abuse scandal has clearly given them a black eye and their continued arrogance in not to seek outside help has cost them respect from the evangelical community.  Times are hard for PBI right now and it remains to be seen if they will survive.  From my standpoint, it is abundantly clear that God brought us survivors together and that he didn’t “go to all this trouble” just to see us fall on our faces.  I think the abuse scandal is the biggest challenge PBI has ever faced and how they ultimately handle this will be either their saving grace or their downfall.  It truly is in their hands - or should I say in in the Maxwell’s hands.

Prairie Bible Institute Blames Abuse Survivors for Money Woes

In the Winter 2013 issue of Prairie Harvester magazine President Mark Maxwell makes another feeble attempt to divert attention from Prairie Bible Institute’s shameful handling of their abuse scandal by blaming the survivors for its precarious financial situation.  In the fall of 2011, Prairie Bible Institute became embroiled in an abuse scandal as more than 90 former staff children and students broke their silence about the physical, sexual and emotional abuse they endured at Canada’s oldest independent Bible college in Three Hills, Alberta.  

What seems to have pitted the two sides against each other is Prairie's reluctance to own up to their responsibility for having created an environment that made it easy for abuse to thrive.  The survivors want the school to admit that their ultra-conservative fundamentalist dogma, emphasizing patriarchal authority created an environment where women and children were abused with impunity.  The survivors say it was impossible to stand up to their abusers because a child had no way of challenging their male authority figures.  They want Prairie to acknowledge that abuse was prevalent and that in many cases, the school knew about it but did nothing.   They want Prairie to humble themselves and repent for the abuse.  The survivors want to hear a sincere apology from the school.  

On the other hand, Prairie seems to be most concerned about damage control and and keeping its dirty laundry from being aired.  Prairie created a "Healing Team", which is a group of unlicensed alumni who counsel abuse victims.  Survivors are encouraged to contact them to share their stories.  The Healing Team's emphasis seems to be on forgiveness and reconciliation with little focus on holding the perpetrators responsible.  For abuse survivors whose abusers often used the Bible and God against them, this approach is less than appealing.  A third-party was set up but quickly disbanded.  

When the abuse survivors first came forward, they were met with vicious hostility from the alumni who felt the survivors were “enemies of God sent to destroy the school and thus destroy the work of God.”  Instead of Prairie providing a supportive environment for survivors to seek some closure, the school quickly distanced itself from the survivors by insisting that they report their abuse to the police.  Many of the survivors were dealing with abuse that happened decades ago.  Naturally the police were not able to bring any charges against the perpetrators due to the lack of evidence.  And it seems that this is where Prairie Bible Institute wants to leave it.  Survivors have basically two choices: go to the healing team or go to the police.  This has left the survivors in a quandary because not everyone wants to go to the police and some have lost their faith in Christianity and are not interested in telling their story in a faith-based setting.  Yet all of the survivors want to be heard and acknowledge.  And they all deserve that.

Mark Maxwell would have the public believe that any survivor who has wanted to find some closure has been given that opportunity and the only ones still talking are “just whiners who don’t want to be healed and just have an axe to grind with the school”.  This simply is not true.  Take two cases in point – you will notice that these are not “decades old cases” like the school wants you to believe.  In 2006, an employee of the school sexually assaulted a high school girl on campus.  Both the victim and her mother sent six emails to Mark Maxwell which he refused to respond to.  When the survivors talked about the issue on the internet, Mark took to the media to defend himself.  He feels that Prairie Bible Institute is not responsible because the victim was a student of Prairie Christian Academy, which is a separate entity.  Never mind that the rape took place on PBI property by one of its employees.  Later he told a reporter that the victim was actually dating the assailant, which was a complete lie.  This was just another attempt to minimize the fact that a crime had been committed.  Just another attempt to pass the buck.

Another case in point – and it is also a recent case.  A former staff kid sent a 27-page email to Mark Maxwell detailing the abuse she suffered at the hands of her mother, father and brother.  The brother and father did facilities work on campus and the mother was still employed full-time in a prominent position at the school.   All of them had unfettered access to the students.  Since April of 2012, Mark has refused to respond to this victim and continues to harbor the female perpetrator as an employee in good standing.  The victim reported her abuse to the police but she was not willing to press charges and risk the possibility that her entire family would be sent to prison.  This situation was covered up until I blew the whistle on the school.  I don't know how Mark Maxwell can say he is being open and transparent!  Had I not blown the whistle, this would still be covered up.

  

One of the main frustrations of the survivors has been that Mark Maxwell has used the media to portray that the school is handling this scandal very well when in fact they have done a dismal job.  When they couldn’t silence us, the school engaged in a strategy of completely ignoring us.  This is a foolhardy tactic and will not resolve anything.  It appears that this strategy is already backfiring on Prairie.  

Here are the remarks of President Mark Maxwell in the Prairie Harvester and my comments in red to set the record straight.

"Every three years and independent Student Satisfaction Inventory is conducted on Prairie campus to determine what matters most to the students and how satisfied they are with their school. Rated at the tops this past spring were comments that revolved around feeling welcomed, accepted and cared for by campus staff and faculty, including a strong sense that the campus is "safe and secure for all students.”  (No big deal, this rah-rah response is to be expected from current students.  Most of them don't know any of the survivors.)

"During the past twelve months we have faced allegations of abuse from years past that have colored the image of Prairie, (notice the most significant thing to Mark Maxwell is not that children were abused but that these allegations marred the reputation of his beloved school) so this is a very significant statement from our students (no, what is significant is that Prairie Bible Institute puts its own reputation ahead of the abuse of children – that is what is significant).  In any organization involving so many people over nearly a century, there is certainly the likelihood that difficult and inappropriate situations will arise. (Don’t use euphemisms – it wasn’t difficult and inappropriate situations, it was the abuse of children by staff and students of the school). We regret the hurts that have been carried, in some cases for years, and want to make our campus a place where people can be both heard and healed. (If you truly want the campus to be a place where people can be heard and healed then you need to respond to the survivors who have contacted your school - all of them.  Not just the ones who want to reconcile with the school).  This school belongs to God and it is crucial that we be known as a place of love and acceptance with appropriate safeguards and policies in place" (Do you call your strategy of silence and ignoring the survivors as being loving and accepting?  You talk a good talk about God but where is the compassion that Christians are supposed to have?  The most common question I get asked by the survivors is "how can these people say they love Jesus and treat us this way?")

"I believe that transparency, coupled with good policies, goes a long way toward ensuring a safe environment, as does a community in genuine harmony where people are respected, friendships are strong and supportive and people are not afraid to speak out." (People are terrified to speak out because of the vicious attacks from the alumni.   The staff and students that are currently there have recoiled from the survivors and are not involved.  As for believing in transparency Mark Maxwell, needs to show it by his actions.  We have seen time and time again where he has not been transparent with us.  What he tells the media doesn't match what we see.)

"It is easy to lose sight of the fact that countless young men and women have found new life and growing spiritual maturity during their time at PBI, due in no small part to the impact of Prairie faculty and staff both now and in years past. Many of them were instrumental in shaping young lives for the glory of God. We also thank our alumni and friends who have stood with us and given support and advice. It was so encouraging to see the Prairie family come together this summer at our Homecoming celebrations." (This is typical Maxwell speak for “we will love you if you follow our agenda and behave.  If not, then we don’t want anything to do with you.”  Also a common mantra has been “look at all the good the school has accomplished” as if the good outweighs the bad.  Hurting people don't need to be told how great the school is - they need the school to be great towards them.)

"An unfortunate result of the social media attacks (speaking out about our abuse is seen as an attack – it is the same old mentality that “these survivors are enemies of God sent to destroy the school) has been a decrease in donations at a time when they are much needed.  (Glad to see that people are starting to vote with their wallets.  It is a sure sign that not all the alumni agree with the way the school is treating its abuse survivors).  And yet it is so evident that God is continuing to work in this place, preparing men and women to impact a needy world. There is a great opportunity here and we are committed to being a part of what God is doing. We'd love to have you join us."  (Another rah-rah speech about God being on PBI’s side and thus inferring that the survivors are against what God is doing.)

     Mark Maxwell

This is just more of the same coming from the PBI propaganda machine.  
I predict that as long as Prairie Bible Institute continues to arrogantly treat its survivors with contempt, they will continue to lose supporters and donations.  You cannot treat brokenhearted people the way they have treated us and expect anything good to come of it.  What goes around comes around.  You reap what you sow...

* You can find the article in the Prairie Harvester at the following link  

http://www1.prairie.edu/pdf/development/Harvester/HarvesterWinter2013.pdf